Selfish people don’t regret the wrong done

(By Hella Ahmed) You don’t have to be a “shark’ to know all about these manipulative and controlling individuals who strive to present a good face to the public while hurting specific targets for money and fame, fake illusory success. I am an expert at decoding the maneuvers of big and tiny ones among them which all seem so small to me, because I know that everything they do is calculated and that the bases of their logic are profit and selfishness.

I’m not saying profit isn’t a good goal in life, it’s what we all want as entrepreneurs, but sharks are like pirates, they don’t have word, they are unreliable and they lack functional emotional empathy. They are disconnected and they have no shame.

What causes hypocrisy and war?

“Power trip” and of course money! No “life coach” or jet setter accompanying a powerful man can program men’s brains to make them good leaders. And even though conscious leadership is taught by competent “coaches” so that people can be good together and to each other, the most powerful have other ways of dealing with the masses. Great power is inherited or acquired by the most egocentric personalities. No one is in a position to make them zen, they play monopoly on a large scale (with other people’s money), travel in private jets, eat the best foods, spend outrageously luxurious vacations, they are elsewhere, they basically don’t care about what some bright lucid people think of it all.

It’s still patriarchy, being a famous woman promoted by powerful men, who preaches, will not invent a goal for ruling leaders other than “power and money”! Furthermore, people who focus on one thing in their speeches (emotional intelligence for example), as if it were the magic bulletproof solution, are essentially selling something, an image, glamour, a way to be talked about! The reality is much more complex, and that’s why we have real essayists to talk/write about it. There is no “ordinary love” in business and politics, but that doesn’t mean there is any extraordinary love either, or even any at all! The world’s economy began with violence and discrimination, on a global scale, this mentality will stay, it is in our planet’s genes and we must deal with it.

When you have a sharp mind and you notice everything, you analyze to make sense of things, you develop your awareness even more by doing so, by being vigilant, by always having a plan! It’s an adequate response to your environment! You do not act blindly but according to what you see and know, even if it is invisible to the naked eye. So-called “sharks” no longer scare you and you can persist in telling them that their twisted motives seem damn clear to you, they will continue to be vicious and invasive, because that is their nature, they can’t do better. They constantly overestimate themselves and underestimate others because they’re just not that smart, they are narcissistic in a very toxic way.

A sense of emergency

There is an important side to the traumatic experience of having been denigrated and abused psychologically and/or physically, it is the long-term « sense of urgency » that unfortunately one must endure, but also fortunately get to know too. Let me explain, traumatized people can be in semi-automatic mode for a long time, in survival mode, suffering, the spirit bleeding, almost half awake, scattered by stress, in hiding, while trying to display a dignified posture despite everything.

The feeling of urgency therefore exists before regaining power over our body/mind by becoming solid/lucid. Then comes the realization that too much time has passed, and a different sense of urgency is experienced, it becomes important to no longer waste precious time which will not come back. Another case, imagine growing up in a ghetto or a war zone, deprived of your human rights, your dignity is then most likely linked to « a state of combat and resentment/or the narrow vision of the fighter who cannot afford non-vigilance”. Compassion is the key to understanding and freeing ourselves from double standards.

Between excessive resentment and destructive rage, there is acceptance. When we accept the truth, we do not accept the continuation of what happened and what is happening, we simply become aware of the distressing reality of the world and the limitations of those who are unable to change their treacherous mentality. We become stronger than their poor disordered habits. It’s irritating how these so-called sharks don’t know regret, the remedy however is to focus on the fact that when they include us in their mischievous little plans, they are showing weakness and stupidity, they are admitting some kind of inferiority. This is the true resounding victory.

Frailties and empathy

People with poor mentalization may lack empathy towards themselves, not being sufficiently connected to their feelings, their real needs and desires! It is absurd to believe that hyper vigilance necessarily or generally prevents us from having empathy! Many people experience trauma or catastrophic circumstances, but they still feel empathy and act accordingly. War situations illustrate this reality quite well: a great solidarity exists and it is empathy as well as the feeling of carrying a collective destiny which are at its origin.

Not being available to perform philanthropic or altruistic acts does not negate the empathy that exists within oneself. And what good is empathy when it only becomes the subject of an endless theatrical scene? When we want and can act with empathy, we do it, we don’t just talk about it.

Also, no one carries the collective destiny on their shoulders first, in a fairly normal context where it is possible to evolve, there is a difference between the gift of oneself when possible and the sacrifice of oneself guided by guilt and an illusory feeling of obligatory loyalty while many people live their best lives without worrying about what others go through or what they make them do in order to succeed in being rich and well known. Happiness and comfort, success and prosperity are legitimate rights, and not just for the privileged who have inherited endless opportunities.

Are we doomed?

There is no removal of the mask for the so-called sharks, they will only change the stated postulate. The intention behind the upcoming dishonest act will not differ, they will simply modify their strategies slightly. Anyone who wishes to continue to act badly does not remove the mask that hides his machiavellianism, but we can begin to know the true character after having observed him/her for long enough using similar tactics to cheat and subtly or frankly hurt specific targets. The predator ends up having to put on a new soft false facade projecting honesty to stay in the game and be appreciated by the public or someone in particular with certain high standards.

Hella Ahmed 2024 © All rights reserved – Find my books on Amazon