(By Hella Ahmed) Mental overload, whether it happens in the context of misguided therapy or within cults exploiting personal development to gain control, shows up when someone floods you with confusing talk that seems helpful. They make you believe that their supposedly deep words hold an essential truth, when really they just sow doubt and confusion. The person manipulating you, sensing your vulnerability, takes advantage of their influence to throw you off balance, only to act like they’re saving you afterward, keeping you on a leash. Run!

How small and sad!

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Confusion is not joy.

No, you shouldn’t accept confusion being presented as a form of joy, or let someone push you into endless introspective work in therapy under the pretense of uncovering parts of yourself you reject in others to reach some so-called state of grace. This kind of talk is meant to waste your precious time and money while making you feel foolish. Confusion is an uncomfortable state, a phase it’s good to move past. Keeping you trapped in a vicious cycle, dangling a lifeline like you’re a fish to catch, won’t heal your soul—it will only heighten your anxiety and trap you.

This doesn’t mean therapy has to be quick. It’s known that lasting behavioral change usually takes about three months. But therapy isn’t always about changing behaviors. It can, for example, help you make peace with your past, feel more in tune with your choices, or overcome nagging doubts that spoil your joy, slow your actions, or lead to clumsy decisions made in confusion. Therapy is supportive guidance.

Therapy and coaching

Therapy also helps reduce existential angst and various forms of anxiety. It fosters a healthier, more genuine relationship with yourself and others in a clear, realistic, and calm setting. It builds confidence in yourself and in life by rebuilding foundations that may be shaky or collapsed: a sense of safety, recognition of your own worth that fuels ambition, or the belief that the world can welcome you with love and respect, despite everything. Therapy makes you stronger when it’s done right.

There are short-term therapies that provide valuable support for moving past confusion or what feels like dead ends. When a longer-term trusting therapeutic relationship is needed, based on the client’s feelings, the benefits are just as meaningful. Coaching, delivered by qualified professionals in psychological intervention, focuses on practical solutions. Without diving deeply into a person’s private life, it addresses the broad strokes of their struggles, supports motivation and emotions, and guides practical steps to improve quality of life. This solution-focused approach is especially valuable for those seeking targeted help.

The nonsense of the “parts of you” speech 

This idea that the flaws you see in others are a mirror of “parts of you” you refuse to accept, inviting you on some spiritual journey, is empty talk. It’s manipulative rhetoric used to fill a void and gain power over a well-meaning person who thinks they’re dealing with an enlightened guide. In reality, it’s quackery, a filler used by those lacking knowledge, pretending to be profound, or trying to impress while selling hot air. This kind of talk often comes with fake empathy and little gestures of understanding, while insisting that confusion is somehow a form of joy or a great sign of some future breakthrough.

These approaches encourage controlling relationships, whether in a pseudo-therapeutic setting or elsewhere. The more vulnerable and guilty a person feels for not “loving” their aggressors, the more these fake therapists control them, making them fragile and manipulable. There’s plenty of documentation on mental manipulation: these are often cunning individuals who loudly display fake humanity while sadistically destabilizing their victim, sometimes, even often, to exploit them financially.

Reject intrusion

If someone invades your personal space and disrespects your boundaries or your property, it has nothing to do with a “hidden part” of yourself you need to confront or embrace. You have rights, and defending them is essential. Moralizing speeches preaching acceptance of an aggressor are dangerous. You’re not obligated to maintain relationships with disrespectful or toxic people who think they can do whatever they want and ruin lives.

There won’t be a glowing light radiating from your face like a heavenly blessing after one therapy session (though with rest, maybe some hope and a will to fight for survival if you find the right hands). You won’t see a Jesus-like halo around your head if you sit stunned by empty talkers. Therapy isn’t a scary slog or an instant miracle. It’s just small, practical steps toward more inner peace and a gentler life. Care is simply smart, kind, specialized, tailored, and up-to-date support.

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