When you distance yourself and they get obsessed

Feeling contempt and being disgusted by someone’s attitude seems ok to me. It is not a choice, it is something that happens to us. Sometimes, some nutcases keep obsessing about you for years, they get deeply involved in a scheme : trying to prove to you a few things you absolutely don’t care about and probably won’t ever be intrigued by. You just really don’t like them and you don’t owe them anything, you certainly don’t have to admire their narcissistic persona, bow to their pushy invasive presence in your territory, read their works or buy their albums. You don’t have to be a fan or a disciple. You want your space, and that’s just fine.

Some people become passive-aggressive when you make it clear that you want to keep your distance and protect your ground, they play it cool and charming though, sub-tweeting about you, all the time, endlessly. But why this restlessness? Why acting like the victim of an ego crash trying to regain power by getting fixated on the person who is just not into being involved in a one-sided relationship deemed necessity by the lunatic?

Why can’t we say no? How to make it stop?

Sarcasm is a good tool to re-frame what is hard to get by the obsessed stalker, although some big show offs characters won’t learn from it. They won’t give you a break to go on living their lives and leave you alone. They don’t realize that persistence is rude when it is a threat to someone’s right to freely choose. And the simple fact that there are billions of people on this planet that have the right to express themselves and feel free about making personal choices should be a good proof to make them understand that they can’t force themselves on you. But it just doesn’t make it, the message doesn’t come across. The real issue is one of dysfunctional behaviour and some kind of out of context revenge and of course cheesy competition. It is not about you, it is about what they need, and you just happen to be a good help to boost their ego and their career. They choose you and they don’t care about your consent.

When you block someone on social media you just don’t like, you want to distance yourself so they would stop thinking about you, but some profiles, often narcissistic ones with the tendency to think that they have the right to control people by morally harassing them, become very obsessed when you reject them or set some boundaries. All their stories turn into being based on your content, showing that their primary focus is on you and what you do, while you are, on the other hand, focusing on your own business, becoming very annoyed by their stupidity.

They get fixated, which is unhealthy and also a sign of a mental characteristic or an issue related to stalking, when it’s not simply about commercial parasitism, Copycat stalking and fraud. They do it because it’s out of their control or they do it because they simply hate to act differently. You have many options when you don’t need to act this way and they seem to not have them. Either it’s basic wickedness and greed combined or it’s a sickness and it’s overpowering them, or of course both cases at the same time like it is often the situation with Copycat stalking. They lose their freedom to love and be fair as they play nice and loving to hide what’s really ongoing (stalking and dishonesty), probably feeling dead inside, happily depressed.

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